How to Skillfully Encourage People
“Man does not live on bread alone,” right?
People need food for the spirit as well as for the body. Remember how you feel when a kind word or compliment is given you?
Remember how your whole day or evening is brightened up by that kind word or compliment?
Remember how long the good feeling lasts?
Well, others will react just as you do. So–say the kind of things that people need to hear (we hear enough negative, so let’s stay positive and uplifting, although don’t feel the need to be fake and sappy either). They will love you for saying kind things and you will feel good for having brightened their step and giving them hope.
BE GENEROUS WITH YOUR PRAISE!
Look for somebody and something to praise and then DO IT!
1. The praise must be sincere: if it isn’t, then don’t give it.
2. Praise the act, not the person.
Praise the act avoids embarrassment and confusion, it has a much more sincere ring to it, and it avoids charges of favoritism and it creates an incentive for more of the same act.
For example, “Hey Shawn, your work this past year has truly been excellent” (rather than “Shawn, you are a good man.” Sounds kinda flat and generalized, huh?
“Michelle, you did a splendid job on your homework!” Rather than “Michelle’s a good student.”
“Mr. Smith, your lawn and landscaping is simply beautiful” rather than “Mr. Smith, you work hard!”
Make the praise specific–pinpoint it.
Get into the habit of saying daily one kind thing to at least three different people (Spouse, child, co-worker, etc.). Then see how YOU feel for having done so!
This is a happiness formula for YOU!
When you see the happiness and gratitude and pleasure you bring others by doing this YOU will reap the benefits too. There is more joy in giving than receiving after all.